After a surprisingly fast drive to Pennsylvania, and a visit to my sister's, I parked my car in the driveway and darted into the garage. The firs sight I saw? Cody. Bouncing around like a maniac. Cody then proceeded to jump on me (punctuated with an "OW! My boobs! OW!"), wrap his paws around my waist (I swear to god, he does that) and give me a hug.
Feeling very loved, I grabbed Cody's collar and pulled him in to the house behind me, where my dad was sitting at the bar, eating a sandwich. Calling very loudly "Daddy I'm home!" my dad responded in a rather curious manner. Let's have a bit of dialogue, shall we?
Ash: *walks through door* Hi Daddy! I'm home!!
Dad: *glances up* Oh, hey Ash, where's your mom?
Ash: *confused* Umm...right behind me
*Mom walks in door*
Dad: Look! Alvenia! I bought you a new vacuum cleaner! LOOK AT IT! ISN'T IT COOL?!?!
Mom: OMGZ! OMGZ! WOW! *grabs vacuum, immediately starts vacuuming kitchen*
Ash: Ummm...so I don't even get a hug?!?!?!?!
Dad: *hugs Ash* Welcome home! Your mother and the dog really missed you. But not me. Never me. I never miss you. Never. DAMNIT STOP TAKING MY MONEY!
Ash: QUOI?!?!!?!?!?!
Dad: Look at her use that vacuum...she certainly is excited...
Ash: It's a vacuum...I'm so confused...
Mom: Here! Ash! Take the vacuum and go clean something! It's so much fun!!
Ash: Umm...thanks but no?
So yes...that was my welcome home...to make it even better...guess what? When I came home...the house was clean...y'all know what that means.
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