Don't make me live for my Friday nights.

Everyone, I'd like to introduce you to the official mascot of the Empire of KatAsh. His name is Jabba and, if you value your limbs, you will show him respect. Notice that menacing stare in his eyes? This is one very very bitter, angry turtle. If you got hit by a semi you'd be a little touchy too. While in the Banks (just shy of Nags Head), Kat, an incredibly helpful local, and I rescued this "little" guy from the side of the road where he lay belly up after getting hit by a truck. I feel it necessary (out of respect for Jabba) to indicate that when I use the term "little" I use it in the sense that an F 16 is smaller than a 757. Also, I'd like you all to recognize the fact that an F 16 has a good deal more fire power than a 757, what with the attached bombs and guns. At any rate, after dragging the turtle out of the pond we'd stupidly put him in with a stick (he latched onto it like a Rottweiler latches onto a steak) we dragged him via plyboard (pictured below) to the local's truck where she transported him to a vet's office to get "fixed up." I can only hope those vets sedated him properly. Otherwise there is no doubt in my mind that he'd retaliate. And by retaliate I do in fact mean mutually assured destruction. You'll all be happy to know that they plastered his shell and he's fine, happily released back into the wild, none the worse for the wear.

Jabba, I salute you, and one day, we will meet again. Fates such as ours are sure to be inextricably intertwined.