No, David, I am not trading sexual favors with Flogging Molly for an autographed CD for you!!!!

Yeah...I feel like that shouldn't have been my header but hey...whatever...

SO! Today (or rather tonight) I'm here to talk to y'all about a pair of pants. Yes, you heard me correctly, a pair of pants. NO! This is not a magical pair of pants that miraculously fit everyone who wears them...they fit only me...however...I would like to tell you their story...

Let us first begin with a description of said pants, yes?

These pants are stretchy jeans...supposedly coloured black. They're just slightly too long for me in the back, which is actually how I like my jeans. By "supposedly coloured black" I mean that these jeans are approximately 2 years old and they've been through the mill...a lot...they've been hit with bleach and are oddly discoloured in places and have been washed so many times I think they are more appropriately described as grey than as black. They've been washed so many times that they are developing holes everywhere...holes that I am desperately trying to ignore for the next 15 days or so...At any rate...I really hope that y'all are smart enough to have come to this conclusion by now..but for those slow puppies out there...yes...I am describing my work pants.

Now...these pants have seen me through 2 tours of duty safely...that is...employment at 2 different fast food restaurants, Wendy's and Arby's respectively (god help my poor poor soul). And they've certainly bourne the war wounds of my endeavours at attaining money...however, because of the horrible memories attached to fast food for me, I feel no loyalty to the pants...none what so ever.

So...basically...my time as a minimum wage slave at fast food is coming to a close...I already have a job lined up for next summer, and I have no intention to work over breaks. So, with any luck AT ALL (felix felicis, I NEED YOU!!) I will never have to put on those pants again...

...to commemorate this incredibly special occasion...and to make sure that I never put on those damn pants again...I am going to burn these pants. If you think I'm kidding..you are horribly mistaken...and yes..in my head I said that with my Pennsylvania accent. I'm setting these damn pants on fire to attempt to purge the horrible summers of fast food from my memories...

On some random notes...thanks to Steve and Kat for commenting on my last entry, your opinions mean a lot to me...however, Steve, you have made me realize that I'm going to hell because I would, in fact, leave a boyfriend if someone better came along (depending upon the current relationship, of course).

Let's see...ummm...I officially hate people who punctuate every sentence with "yo." Not that I didn't before, mind you, but now it's official. Seriously, do you know how stupid you sound? I hate even more the people who declared ebonics an official language. Fuckers.

Is it sad that AU (sorry that isn't AU red and AU blue by the way..I guess that's the SOUL BENEFIT FOR SPENDING THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS ON THE PATENTS FOR COLOURS! STUDENTS CAN'T USE THEM TO MOCK YOU IN THEIR BLOGS. Oh wait, I just did that. You officially fail, though I still love you so very much) has given me no choice but to put my advisor in my cell phone contacts list?

FLOGGING MOLLY on Saturday. Can you say woot?!?!?!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to a very special ADAM! My dearest husband, much love, though I have no idea what to get you.

NICHOLAS! Good luck on Saturday, you'll do great (as you always do) and then can finally get sleep again.